Irish Taxi

Roy August 26th, 2010

Manager of the Dandelion came around to the Green and asked me to head around to the club to pick up an important guest, I obliged, although I hate these jobs,  they make you look like you are snatching only meters from the rank and they always get messy…… folk take an age to come out.

Sure enough I was sat there for a while as I assumed the long goodbyes were being dealt out inside the venue but eventually lots of young Irish girls arrived out along with two black American lads. The girls were screaming “Jason!” , “Jason!”, two of the girls were escorted to the car along with the two lads and I was made aware that the younger of the two was Jason Derulo the greatest thing since anything ….everrrrrrrrrrrrr.

Just looked him up on Google and sure enough it was this guy:

Listened to one of his songs on Youtube and actually recognised it! He’s the bloke who sings like a girl and raps with a DEEEEEEEEEEEP voice ….kinda weird but good ???

Manager threw me a twenty for the trip around to the Morrison ….. sweet!

Another one to add to the list of “Famous people” and this one might actually impress the younger crowd!

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Roy August 1st, 2010

I had the pleasure of meeting David Dalton, the chief executive as well as two employees of Plan Ireland, a child centered charity where contributers sponcer a child in a developing country, monies are used to develop the child’s locality in order to improve his/her chances in life.
Rarely have I heard such enthusiasm for a project as I witnessed from the three lads (it was during a recent Ireland By Taxi journey) and I was only to happy to agree to doing this post promoting the project.
Please visit them here Plan Ireland,

I won’t talk about the three drunks I brought home later that evening (It was a wedding in Rathnew)

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Roy January 5th, 2010

I get a lot of complaints about doormen and cloakroom attendants:

Doormen who didn’t let my passengers in for a multitude of reasons, all grossly unfair according to them…….. but for the most part if I was a doormen I wouldn’t have let them in either.

Cloakroom attendants who refuse to return coats/Jackets Bags etc when my passenger has lost their ticket, are seemingly the worlds worse…….they’d also be the worlds worse if they handed your  coats/Jackets Bags to someone who hadn’t got a ticket, the answer to this problem is fairly simple, Don’t lose your ticket!

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Roy December 17th, 2009

If you eat Chips/Fries/Pomme frittes with your hands everything you touch with your greasy mits will leave a smear/stain behind you.

If you eat a sandwich/burger/hot dog you will leave bits of onion, tomato, meat and crumbs behind you.

If you have crisps, rancheros, monster munch there will be a smell of stale barbeque lingering for hours after you leave.

The Commission for Taxi regulation helpfully  added the following to the passenger information leaflet.

You are Obliged to:

Not consume food or drink

The same people that try to eat the above crap in the back of my Taxi, are probably the same ones that complain that the previous Taxi they’d taken smelled of stale barbeque and had greasy stains and bits of food on the carpet!

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Roy December 12th, 2009

I’m amazed at the number of  medical experts  in Dublin who are able to diagnose that the palatic drunk muppet that’s falling all over the back seat and barely able to speak, “will be grand and won’t puke in your Taxi” as they try and ditch him/her and get back to the party.

Eh ……… No thanks…….. you can take him/her back

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Roy December 9th, 2009

What was said:

I’m sorry I’ll round the fare down to €5, I thought it best to avoid the traffic on Camden Street.

What I wanted to say:
Regardless of what way we went it was only around the corner, if you were that worried about the fare you should have walked!

Actual Fare was €5.45 = €4.45 starting fare + €1 for the extra passenger, meter never even got to trip over !

There is a lot of tongue holding required in the Taxi business, patience is probably the ultimate requirement

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Roy December 5th, 2009

The Scenario:

It’s raining heavily, a couple of tourists decide to get a Taxi from St Stephens Green to their hotel, the Conrad Hilton on Earlsfort Terrace. (just on the far corner of the Green)

Off I go, taking a right off the Green down Dawson Street, then a Right  on to Molesworth Street, right again on to Kildare Road taking me back to the Green exactly to the spot where I picked them up. I then pass a bus lane which would take me directly to their hotel and head into heavy traffic on Merrion Row.

At this point after a fair bit of fidgeting in the back seat the gentleman reminds me that we’re going to the Conrad hotel, I appologise for the round-about nature of our trip and tell him it’s not my fault that it’s to do with the one way system that is in place. He argues that Taxis can take the bus lane and I try to explain the rule regarding contra flow bus lanes with little success.

A tense atmosphere develops in the car but I continue on down Baggot Street,  taking a right on to Pembroke Street, all the while listening to grunts and grumbles from the rear seat, eventually we turn on to Leeson Street and arrive at the junction of the Green, at the far side of the Bus lane that began all the hassle, just as a Taxi passes through  after traveling down it.

The passenger argues that the Taxi had used the Bus Lane, therefore proving beyond all doubt that I am ripping him off , I countered that the driver was risking a fixed €50 fine and a penalty point which I was not willing to take,  the passenger was having none of it and insisted he was going to complain about me, I appologised for the misunderstanding and asked him would he please confirm my reasoning with the Gardai prior to doing so.

His wife paid the fare and gave me a €1.50 tip!

I have done this same trip many times before and the above scenario is a regular feature.

Either we should be allowed use contra flow Bus Lanes (what is the reasoning behind the rule?)  or passengers should be made well aware that we are not allowed use them (ie No Taxis allowed sign)

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Roy November 7th, 2009

Here’s how this works. You get the facts exactly like they were given to a Taxi Limousine Commission (NYC) Judge. We give you the defense that was made before the judge. You make up your mind whether he or she is guilty or not guilty. Decision now at the end of the post

Listed below are the charges the driver faced and the penalties/fines  that could be served on foot of a guilty verdict, notice that there is a sliding scale based on the severity of the offense unlike our €250 fine whether it’s because you forgot your pencil or aren’t licensed to operate
Charges:
2-21A : reckless driving :$350-$1,000 and/or suspension 30 days or revocation, 4 points
2-42A: discourteous :$150, 2 points
2-45A: not using shortest route :$50-$150, 2 points
2-46B :not giving receipt :$25, 1 point
2-60A :harassing passenger :$350-$1,000 and/or suspension 30 days, 3 points
2-61A2 :action against public interest :$150-$350 and/or suspension 30 days, 3 points

Facts:
A young lady in her 20′s was out drinking with friends who put her in the taxi at 2 A.M. She went from Tribeca to Brooklyn Hts. She gave directions but the driver failed to make the last turn. He offered to drop her there a few doors down from where he should have made the turn. She became very upset and said “you
wouldn’t make your mother walk down there! That is, if you have a mother.” The driver backed through the intersection and deposited her at her door. She paid by credit card and became more irate when the driver ordered her out of the cab. After the pick-up the driver accelerated and the girl fell back against the seat. She complained that the driver was driving too erratically. She began using her cell phone and loudly made
insulting remarks about the driver. At the destination the driver heard her say “on the right.” She really said “make a right” but it was all mixed up with her cell phone trash talk. The driver asked her to walk the few
doors down but she refused and became abusive. When she got to the destination she paid by credit card and became more irate when the driver ordered her out of the cab.

Defence

After the pick-up the driver accelerated and the girl fell backagainst the seat. She complained that the driver was driving too erratically. She began using her cell phone and loudly made insulting remarks about the driver. At the destination the driver heard her say “on the right.” She really said “make a right” but it was all mixed up with her cell phone trash talk. The driver asked her to walk the few doors down but she refused and became abusive. When she got to the destination she paid by credit card but refused to exit. She kept yelling into the phone that “this dog, this animal” was trying to push her around. The driver then went to the passenger’s door, opened it, and shouted “get out of my cab.” He threatened to call the police to
have her ejected when she finally left the cab.

Decision:

The driver is guilty of 2-42A. fine $150 and 2 points. He should not have exited the cab and shouted “get out of my cab.” All other charges dismissed.

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Roy November 1st, 2009

It happens every year, men in skirts, flirting at every opportunity with other men and girls dressing as sluttish as is humanly possible with legs boobs and ass displayed provocatively behind the ultimate fantasy costumes, including Bo-peep, Pocahontas, French maids and nurses.
Is this night an opportunity for folk to dress as they really are/feel? …..a bunch of transvestites and wannabe prostitutes?
Always makes for an interesting night….here’s to next year!

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Roy October 14th, 2009

Picked up four lads in Stoneybatter last Saturday. appropriate as they’d been on the batter, you know the type all RAH RAH HEY HEY, singing alternative lyrics to perfectly good songs and wondering why your not laughing at their facile jokes.

It’s all part of the job so I tried to take it in good spirit and smiled along as best I could, they wanted to go to Heaven Night Club in Blanchardstown and were asking questions about it during the trip, “would they get in”, “does it get good crowds” and so on……. as it had been recommended by someone outside Mc Gowans after they’d been refused entry there. I answered as best I could based on previous drops I’d made to the venue…saying they’d need to relax a little before approaching the venue and that they’d fit right in with the crowd.

However when we arrived at the venue …..it was closed for renovations, the front passenger wasn’t happy suggesting I knew it was closed and had brought them out to Blanch’ just for the fare, one of the lads in the back agreed and said that they shouldn’t have to pay, thankfully the other two decided it wasn’t my fault and had the money to pay………eventually I brought them to an apartment in Carpenterstown (a much quieter trip)

I did feel a little guilty for not knowing Heaven wasn’t open, but I’m not sure it’s possible to keep track of all the closures and changes to opening hours in recent times and I certainly didn’t accept that I should be out of pocket as a result…….what do you reckon?

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